Letter: I don't even Recognize you anymore

I don't even recognise you anymore. Your face, your words, your personality is all different. And I'm sure if I heard your voice now I wouldn't recognise that either. And now that I think about it, it would probably feel the same if I looked in the mirror now. Time has changed right? And both of us have as well. But amidst all these changing years you have been the constant AND the variable.
We have been the best of friends and yet fallen apart so many times. Only to find our way back to each other. Sorry that it was always you who made the effort.
I let people go with too much ease. But it's always a happy feeling to have you back.
Maybe this will be the last time. We WILL stay friends after this.
It just is so weird. Me seeing you after a year and half, without realising it had already been that long. You not noticing me and me mistaking it for you ignoring me.
You looked scary, truly. Because of the air of determination around you. You looked larger than your presence.
I was intimidated.
And now you reached out, after all this while. Saying things that make me think i never left your mind. Well frankly I never gave much thought to you. Except for just the day before. I was remembering the pact we made, in the school on second floor, looking out the window. Do you remember or is it lost to you?
Well it doesn't matter anymore.
What matters is that you read my letters. What matters is that never in a million years did I think YOU would ever find or read them.
Life works in mysterious ways, I guess.
But now here we are and i don't know how to keep up a conversation. Though this time I want to make an effort. I don't know how to build on this friendship. Because time is still what I'm short on.
And I have only this one way of contacting you and you may go away anytime. And this time if we fall apart again, the blame will only be mine.
And I don't think I can take it. It's a huge responsibility. I don't think I can go through it again. Managing friendships. When did it get so hard Mr A? Just to be able to talk?
We used to be great at doing that. Being friends just by existing next to each other.
I'm the one who got more complicated. I'm sorry i made it seem like it was you.
I've seen a lot of things, been through a lot since you've been gone. But I guess you have too. I bear my fair share of scars and your back ain't spotless either.
So maybe, just maybe, it won't be that hard for us to be who we are. 

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